The Key Ponderer

Human psychology with perception, acts totally different when we are in an 1-on-1 setting and when we are in a group setting.

This perception doesn’t see any difference between a live face-to-face situation or in a software-based chat conversation like the Microsoft Teams, WhatsApp, Slack.

Observe this the next time you have someone state something in a group chat conversation and practice the 5-second check before typing in a response.

If you choose to respond to that public conversation, do you think it’d be a better idea if you instead replied to the person privately, or do you think it’d be okay to respond within that group itself? Does it make the other person look stupid, silly, or does it make them look good – in the group?

Often people take note when you’ve chosen to respond to them in private instead of in the public forum for everyone to see.

That’s the hidden gem in any chatting platform – you can always respond to anyone 1-1 instantly.

This works especially well in two situations:

• when you want to show that you care for the original poster seriously (so the other group members don’t take you for a sucker), or
• you want to avoid a possible perception of ‘showing off’ when providing a solution to a question posted publicly (so the person you’re responding to doesn’t look dumb).

In a simple switch, the other person notices your ingenuity that evidently shows up and they’d respect you for saving their face (if it’s the latter case above). Again, this may not work in all situations but you are the best judge, and that’s when this 5-Second Check will act as your barometer.

Cheers and good luck!

Anytime you want to ping/start a chat conversation with someone at work, especially if that other person is up in the corporate ladder, don’t type ‘Hi <name>’ and leave it at that for them to respond.

Such niceties are good for face-to-face conversations but not on chat mediums. Instead, say ‘Hi <name>’, and then proceed to ask/say whatever you wanted to say – the reason why you pinged that other person – (and if needs be) adding that you didn’t want to waste their time, so you’re keeping it short.

You’ll never know in what situation that other person is, so do them a favour by making your conversation short. They’ll appreciate your brevity.

This is a newbie mistake, in general. But most managers will appreciate you being succinct – just don’t overdo or overact. Remember the first law in the book The 48 laws of power – Never Outshine the Master! Although, I don’t subscribe to that thought, it depends on how you stage it. Achieve that balance, and you’ll be fine.

Cheers and good luck!

This technique works best with any employee but works great if you are a people manager.

Next time you hop on to a call with your manager and they ask you ‘how are you doing’, it’s time you stop answering it with the usual ‘I’m good, thanks, how are you’ response.

For one, this instantly eradicates the epidemic of predictability from you, so you could stand out from your boss’ other subordinates.

Two, it gets the conversation rolling and,

Three, the most important one, is that it shows you are on top of your game (if you want to be, that is).

So, then what else to reply to the ‘How are you?’ question from your boss? Here’s the thing:

“Well, I just finished my compensation discussions with all the 15 folks, and the product release went smooth, as you know!” — you get the point – just talk anything that you’ve done after your last call/meeting with the boss. It could be an obvious one, but that’s okay. In fact, that’s the point – start with the obvious ones and you’ll be amazed at where that conversation leads. Sometimes, your boss himself/herself is paranoid about what to talk and how to start the meeting. This will not only help him/her, but also puts you in the lead throughout the meeting. The battle well begun, is half won – and a meeting with a manager is no less, because every interaction counts and you’re obviously being scored. So, get that done well with this mindset.

Cheers and good luck!